There are several things that you can do as you care for someone facing the end of life.
Ira Byock, a hospice physician, has written a book called Dying Well that sets out five tasks that would be helpful for the person to accomplish: saying "forgive me," I forgive you," thank you," "I love you," and "good-bye."
Actually all except for the last are appropriate for each of us every day.
Just sitting with the person without trying to make things better may be the most helpful thing that can be done. So often we want to "fix" things, and there are some things that cannot be fixed.
It is very important that you find ways to care for yourself as you are in this situation. You may find yourself both physically and emotionally exhausted; caring for yourself will allow you to be able to care for those you care about.
Hope Makes Healing Possible!
Patricia Sherman, Ph.D., LCSW
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